Smart search engine marketers like you and me know to write rich content.  This helps to target the the oh-so-famous long tail of user searches.  But some people search for weird stuff; and sometimes Google just doesn't cut it on the relevancy.  In that case, we search engine marketers get a little tail we didn't expect upon analysis!

Because I'm such a nice person, and my blog didn't answer the following fine queries adequately, I will quickly try to fulfill them in this post.  Here's the list:

Note: Yes, they're all real — pulled from Google Analytics.

1. SEO is bullshit
"After extensive research into to origins of this nonsensical query, I have decided that it must be Jason Calacanis searching in vain to find any bullshit in the SEO space."

2. Stop SEO
"Save the … Google?" 

3. Sex SEO programmers"
"We may optimize it, but we certainly don't get any."

4. Guys guide to masturbate better
"Why don't you ask Quadszilla, the master baiter himself?"

5. Who Stole My Business
"SEO is bull, so how would I know?"

I hope this answers all of your burning questions … whoever you are.  I strive for quality.  Thanks.

Do you have any weird search engine queries you recall?

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